HANA REBECCA BURRIS

Hana Rebecca Burris is our third oldest and fourth child to join our family. Phil and I both agree that of all the adoptions, Hana’s adoption was the fastest, cheapest, smoothest and easiest one we’ve encountered. As we say to everyone, “Hana just fit!” It was a peculiar feeling, but from the moment she entered our home, it was as if she had always been with us.

It all started back in August of last year. We had just moved to Fort Lewis and had to do Amornthep’s last post-placement report. Susan Holmgren from AAI came out to our house to meet us. As we were interviewing, we mentioned to her that we would like to pursue adoption again, but our pocket book needed a rest from Amornthep’s adoption and we wanted to explore foster care as an option once again. She was very encouraging and the process began.

Based on my previous comments about foster care, the amount of work and training you have to go through to become a foster parent in order to adopt within the foster care program is exhausting and way more extensive than any other form of adoption. We had to take 36 hours of PRIDE classes, which are required in just about any state, and your house has to pass very specific safety regulations, not to mention the normal background checks and paperwork that has to occur for most any adoption.

We finally finished all the requirements and we were able to start searching for our next child(ren). There were a few sibling groups we requested information on, but getting a response back from the social workers seemed impossible, only making the wait even more agonizing. Our agency was great in reporting our interest to whatever social worker was in charge of each child or sibling group. However, they even expressed some frustration with the lack of communication. When this happens, you grow tired, restless and frustrated. You start to say to yourself, ‘if they want these children to get adopted so badly, why such a hassle and why are they not responding quicker?’ However, having done this process previously and trying to go through foster care prior, I recognize that they have a large number of children they must attend to and they have to ensure that the placement is in the child’s best interest. They definitely do not want the child to be right back in a sad, nightmarish situation all over again. These kids have been through a lot and really need social workers that will look out for their very best interest.

After a few months, we saw a sibling group of three that intrigued us. But, as Phil and I prayed about it, we were not getting the “warm fuzzy” that we so hoped to achieve. This bothered us and I spent many sleepless nights. Deep down, I knew they weren’t the ones, but I believe we wanted children so badly and tired of the wait, that we were forcing the situation. However, during this time, MaKayla kept insisting that there was a black sister out there that needed to join our family. One of the three children we were eyeing was a little 4 year old African American girl. So, I expressed to her that perhaps this is the sister she is referring.

“NOPE,” she exclaimed, “she isn’t the one mom. I know more than ever she is out there waiting for us. She really is mom. You have to keep looking!” MaKayla has always been sensitive to spiritual promptings so I took this comment very seriously. The next morning, Phil and I spoke and came to the decision that these three children were not meant for us. Upon that decision, I walked to my computer to email Susan our decision. However, just as I opened my email, there was an email from her. I didn’t know what it was, but my heart soared as I just knew it was going to be exciting news.

Sure enough, in the email she expressed that there was a family that adopted three children from Ethiopia back in July, but felt they could no longer care for the oldest girl. Her name is Hana and wanted to know if we would be interested in adopting her. As I gazed at her picture, that very same feeling we had with Amornthep came bounding in my soul. SHE WAS THE ONE. SHE WAS THE SISTER MAKAYLA HAD BEEN TALKING ABOUT!

I yelled for Phil to come and read this email and in an instant, he had the same confirmation she was the girl for us. Of course I wrote Susan back and said absolutely, we would love to add Hana to our family. Now looking back, what an amazing learning experience we went through. We realized that those three kids were not meant for us, but we fought and fought the answer, hoping it would change or go away. But, the Lord knows what is best and his perspective is so much more far reaching than our own. Trying to ‘change’ the answer to one we wanted to hear only caused internal turmoil, sleepless nights and a lack of peace. But, as soon as we heeded to the answer that those kids were not the ones, made the decision to obey, the Lord blessed us for our faithfulness. Though this lesson had been taught us many times before, we needed a recent reminder that the Lord is the Master as I will discuss later when talking about the MIRACULOUS events surrounding our little boy in China.

Within a few days, we drove out to Port Townsend Washington to meet our little girl. She was currently staying at an AAI board member’s home until they could place Hana with another family. Chris Little is one amazing women. I should say her entire family is amazing. She has, I believe, 13 adopted children, the majority from Ethiopia. I could be off by a few but if I’m wrong, my guess is that she may have more children than less. You could tell Hana was in love with Chris and her family, and rightly so. She was around children with similar culture and background, and they are a very loving, close-knit family.

Hana had no idea why we were there when we first met her. She enjoyed our company, played with the kids, jumped on the trampoline and even said, “Your husband is a kidder isn’t he?” She was referring to his sense of humor while joining all the kids on the trampoline, doing flips of all sorts. She had a great time and even asked when we were going to go back for another visit. MaKayla then asked Phil if she could spend the night. Phil responded, “Hana, not tonight but I Promise you, we will see you again.”

A few weeks later, Chris drove up to our house with beautiful, adorable Hana. Chris had told her a few days previous that we were going to adopt her. Yes, there was confusion as she did not know why she was leaving her brothers behind, and why she couldn’t live with Chris and her family. But, when she walked in our home, I can not describe how RIGHT it just felt. It was just such an incredible, easy transition.

That night, and only night, we let her come in and sleep with us. During that night, while Phil was snoring away, she and I had a great talk and she shared a little about her mother in Ethiopia and watching her die, etc. This little girl had been through a lot and I knew we had to do whatever we could to make her transition easy.

Hana never fully mourned her mother’s loss. No one in Ethiopia really sat down with her to explain death, where she went and why. So, she became intrigued with the idea that we can talk to God and he can actually talk to us. She became obsessed with any discussion about where we go when we die, and she was also very sensitive to discussions about death. Over the following weeks she would continually ask me questions about how she can hear God. I told her it takes practice and that we have to make sure we put ourselves in the proper environment and calm our spirits. She LOVES church and still gets excited for Sundays. She eats up scripture study every night and constantly requests to say the prayer.

One night she asked Phil, her daddy, to give her a Priesthood blessing. After he was done, she ran in my arms and just started sobbing. I asked her how she felt and she said she felt really good inside. I explained to her that was the Holy Ghost letting her know that the things Daddy had said to her in the blessing were true. Then the questions about her mom started to pour out, but only this time, they were even more in depth and with sincere earnest for answers. She shared more of her experience with her mom and we ended up speaking for over an hour. It was an amazing experience for both her and me.

A month past and it was General Conference. General Conference occurs twice a year where our prophet and apostles speak to us and it is broadcast around the world. Because it comes over the internet, we are able to stay home on conference weekend to hear their inspiring words. Elder Bednar, one of my favorites, gave an amazing talk on how we can and have the right to receive personal inspiration and revelation. This talk pricked Hana’s heart deeply and after the conference asked me how she can actually hear God. I again explained to her that God speaks to us in different ways; sometimes it’s an actual, still, small voice in our minds, other times it could be a strong feeling or sensation to do a particular thing, another time it can be a sensation like your heart is burning, but a good, peaceful burning that fills your entire body. But, in order for him to speak to us, we need to be in a quiet place both physically and spiritually and give him time to answer.

About a half hour later I was making lunch and all of the sudden she runs out of her room screaming, “Mom, it burns, it burns!” Of course I was concerned, thinking she hurt herself. I asked her what burns? She looked up at me, with a HUGE smile on her face and pointed to her heart. “Mom, it burns right here! I feel it, it is so strong!”

I asked her why it burns and she continued to tell me that she knelt down in her bedroom, all alone, and asked God if what I was telling her was true and if this church was true. She said that as soon as she asked, her whole body started to burn starting from her head and down to her heart, but it was a nice burning sensation that made her very happy. Is this the Lord speaking to me? I can not even tell you what my expression was on my face, nor the tears I was holding back. At this young age of seven years old, my little Hana had an experience that so many of us in this world could only crave to have. It takes some adults years to experience such a witness. But, in the purity of her heart and innocence of her soul, the Lord saw fit to answer. It just doesn’t get any better than that for a mother.

Hana is an amazing young girl. Her mastery of the English language is uncanny. She just won a bike from school for being the most improved reader. Considering she only has had four months of public school, been in the States for less than a year, and reading at her grade level, it truly is an amazing accomplishment. She is considerate, sensitive to others' feelings, and truly wants to please. She does tend to be a little lazy, but what seven year-old is not? When she first started school she would ask me every 5 seconds for help with her homework. Considering I tutor three children, one that is deaf and the other dealing with learning disabilities due to Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, her frequent requests were getting a bit too much. I’m a Nazi mom when it comes to homework and though I believe in directing them in the right direction, I WILL NOT BUDGE when it comes to making them do the work and do it right. Sure, it would be so much easier for me to just throw in the towel and read the sentence for them; erase the non-capital letter at the beginning of the sentence and write it in myself; sound out the word for them; tell them what this plus that equals, etc. But where would that get them? So, after many afternoons of Hana getting frustrated and probably believing her mom was an Ogre, here she is at the end of the year with a brand new bike.

Of course I was above and beyond ecstatic for her and when the house quieted down I took her aside and said, “Hana, I want you to remember this moment. How amazing you felt when they handed you the bike. You so deserve it. But, this is what I was talking about over the past number of months about why it is so important to work hard, hard as you possibly can. When you work hard Hana, you succeed. What would have happened if I didn’t push you and just did your homework for you? Do you think you would have earned that bike at the end of the year?”

She sheepishly nodded no, then grabbed me and said, “Thank you mom for pushing me to be better!” Again, it doesn’t get any better and, of course, waterworks once again. I share with you these incidences so that one, my children will look back on this and remember and, two, to illustrate that parenting, though VERY difficult, tiring and frustrating at times, can also have the most amazing moments of pure exhilaration that it makes ALL those other times erase away. There just isn’t anything better when you watch a child grow in to an amazing man and women.

This past Wednesday, on June 22, Hana Rebecca Haas became Hana Rebecca Burris. It always amazes me how fast the legalities occur as we weren’t in the court room more than 5 minutes. Nonetheless, she is officially a Burris and on July 5, she is getting sealed to us as our eternal daughter in the Seattle Washington Temple. No matter what happens in this life, she will always be our daughter for all time and eternity. Hana, our amazing little girl!